Steps Toward Self-Improvement

Take a moment for self-improvement.

Many areas of your life function well.  Other areas of your life feel awkward, broken, or glitchy.   In the areas of your life which function, you experience your unique type of prosperity.  In the other areas, you are living types of deprivation. 

Tom will be our first example. 

Tom runs 3 miles a day and lifts weights several days a week.  He enjoys the muscular strength and youthfulness of his efforts.  Tom looks forward to these exercise routines as they are releases, meditations, freedoms and invigorating.  He guards those routines so that nothing interferes with those opportunities to exercise.  He is aiming for an Ironman competition.  He lives in his PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS in his fitness portions of his life.

In contrast, Tom feels intimidated at work with bosses and peers treating him disrespectfully many times a week.  He dreads work yet feels trapped needing the income and believing that other employment and bosses would prove even more intimidating.  Tom lives in his DEPRIVATION CONSCIOUSNESS in his career satisfaction and income portions of his life.

What is your story?  Currently, what in your life do you function within your PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS and what in your life do you dysfunctionally live within your DEPRIVATION CONSCIOUSNESS.

Here are common topics people grapple with in my office which we address with a variety of useful tools including in-depth psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, hypnotherapy, EMDR, EFT, NLP, transpersonal therapy, gestalt work, reality therapy, holistic approaches, energy work or with any combination of other wonderfully scientifically proven methods.    

Weight concerns related to overeating, under-eating, bulimia, anorexia, compulsive eating, malnutritional eating, fitness needs.

Bodily and emotional pains and complications associated to stress, tension, trauma, molestation, sleep complications, fears, unhealthy habits (smoking, excessive alcohol or drugs) and powerless feelings and actions.

Depression, sadness, anger, fear, panic attacks and anxiety of all types, experienced in many ways.

Relationship conflicts, discord or emptiness including emotional, personal and sexual intimacy dissatisfaction.

Identity confusions related to overall confusion about self, about career, about relationships, sexual orientations, purposefulness, manifestation skills, powerlessness, people-pleasing, self-disrespect, severe disruptive life changes (moves, divorce, bankruptcy, deaths) etc.

What are your areas of complications or loss? List them now-quickly, briefly and without self-judgement.  These will become the perfect spots in your life where you can expand your ability to embrace PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS.  Your areas of deprivation now become fertile soil for learning and practicing wonderful skills.   Feel the enthusiasm I have for you?

Let’s begin.

You are about to learn three steps that help you convert your DEPRIVATIONS into PROSPERITIES.   Fold a piece of paper into three equal parts, or draw two lines creating three sections, or use your computer to do the same. 

Exercise One: List the DEPRIVATIONS with which you are coping currently (column one).

Some people prefer to skip Exercise One because it is a bit depression.  Holding a mirror up to your weaknesses in life may feel discouraging.   Remember then to approach this exercise with nonjudgmental self-respect.  You will list these deprivations with a clear intention to create solutions and learn to convert deprivations into prosperities.   Looking at what is broken is not problematic when you quickly jump to the enthusiastic process of creating solutions and finding out that you do have the skills, courage, resources, and tenacity to FIX IT. 

Tom’s list, as mentioned above, included this:  “I let myself be walked-all-over at work.  I let myself be blamed for whatever fails or be yelled at whenever someone feels moody.”

Sharon, a small business owner who successfully coaches CEOs and high level managers in team building, explained:  “I keep myself fat and uncomfortable in my clothes and body, night and day, by grabbing from my stash of candy at work or my Oreo’s at home.  I never want to walk or move around since I can’t stand feeling my sluggish and floppy body moving so awkwardly.”

Jason, a talented novelist and poet awarded in several genres by recognized literary societies, stated: “I keep myself unknown to the public reader as if I never want any one to read my books and really know what I’m thinking. I avoid getting a publicist, setting up my author’s page on Amazon or even simply calling local libraries and bookstores for book signings.”

Sarah, talented and educated internet marketer and strikingly attractive 35 year old who was a bikini model in her 20’s, confessed:  “Money and me don’t mix.  I can’t earn it and I spend whatever I’m given. I depend on others all the time to make ends meet. I’m too embarrassed to admit that I can’t join friends for lunch since I have no money for such because I am behind in my car payments.”

Using these four people as examples, now write your own list of DEPRIVATION areas of your life.  Be quick. Be honest. Own your own dilemmas. Then come back to the next inspiring section.  We will move you into many attitudes and actions of successfully becoming PROSPEROUS in these areas.  You can anticipate that sometimes you will change all at once, and sometimes you will make changes bit by bit and step by step. 

Exercise Two: Document all of your current PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS TOOLS (column two).

Okay, enough depressing realizations for the day, right?  Exercise One was a bit painful but very clarifying.  Yes?

Exercise Two focuses on the opposite side of your life. This includes all the ways in which you are currently very prosperous and how you have become prosperous in those arenas.   

Exercise Two helps you analyze the details of your current PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS TOOLS.   Your current tool box is over-flowing with thoughts, emotions, attitudes, decisions, actions, and practices which you already use expertly.   We all can add to our tool boxes but first we need to fully appreciate the power tools and effective skills we already have mastered that keep us functioning and alive moment by moment. 

Ready?   I will guide your conscious and unconscious process (using one of my many sets of tools) to explore and list your current PROSPERITY CONSCIOUSNESS TOOLS.

First, below I am going to describe the prosperity tools Tom, Sharon, Ned and Sarah from above listed.  Circle in a pleasant color those tools you also recognize in yourself.

Tom’s set of tools include: being happy by himself, rejoicing in the movements of his body, scheduling his day dependably, organizing his day, sticking with routine, focusing his mind, silencing his mind when in movement, pushing himself beyond comfort weekly, recognizing what makes him feel invigorated and doing it daily, recognizing what makes him feel free and doing that daily, loyalty, preferring to be passive and not aggressive when others are hurtful, willingness to work in a team.  He is hard working and has a great work ethic and performance oriented mindset.  He gets things done reliably.  He adjusts to repetitive routines. He faces, even creates challenges as goals and he is trustworthy working toward those goals.

Sharon’s set of tools include: ease with cold-calling, ease with wealthy individuals, ease with powerful individuals, ease with groups, able to take charge of a large group in face of conflict, able to see conflicts and recognize paths for resolution, responsible with paperwork, marketing skills of all sorts, managing her own team, managing moneys of her business, hiring good people, seeking qualified mentors, receiving complements, receiving payment, paying others what they deserve, listening, questioning, providing feedback, answering difficult questions.

Sharon likes people and creates a cheerful atmosphere for all around her.

Jason’s talents include:  reliable submission of his writing to contests, receiving awards, receiving recognition from judges, weekly discipline related to writing and editing, self-criticism of his writing that improves his works, creative mental process, observations of people he knows or strangers which he can translate into readable writing, completion of long and short goals, playing with all sorts of ideas and information, researching, learning, thinking and rethinking, scheduling his days, trusting himself with personal and professional goals related to writing.

Sarah’s talents include: maintaining her weight optimally, grooming herself attractively, preparing and eating healthy tasty foods, taking her vitamins and minerals regularly, exercising regularly, spotting good sales deals and items, recognizing what makes people want to buy something or spend their money, learning new ways to market other’s materials, researching, can use trial and error approach to solving problems related to her client’s marketing, can become enthusiastic for another person’s product, can work independently, computer skills and knowledge, internet skills and knowledge, asks pertinent questions, listens to details and other’s ideas, attends online and in person classes to learn new skills.

Now, after circling those fitting items above, list more of your own individual skills, talents, personality traits, and ways of functioning.  Enjoy yourself while you respectfully recognize what you are good at doing and being and feeling.  Some of your strengths might also create glitches too but be sure to list all your strengths even if they have a “dark” side.